Video Blog Deux!

Here it is... Episode II of my video-blog (VLOG)! Emjoy.

Restless at 1:27am.

As I sit here, enjoying the wonderful flavors of my Jack-in-the-Box faux-taco, I'm thinking. Every once in a while, I think out loud here on my blog in totally abstract, vague, and nonsensical blabber. It's quite a treat if you get to read them. They're normally somewhat depressing yet with a dash of hope in them. I suppose tonight wouldn't be any different.

I mean here I am with a post title that is already dark in itself. 'Restless' signifying that I can't sleep and that obviously something is troubling me. Also, being 1:30 in the morning means that tomorrow's not going to be all that great at work.

So let's get to the heart of the matter. This week I've been deep in thought. I guess the new year always does this to me. It's a time to re-evaluate what's important in life and what takes precedent.

Last year what was important to me was so clear, yet I didn't do all too much to show it or really give it the significance that I claimed to put on it. My actions certainly proved otherwise. Such is life, maybe?

It seems every quarter of the year, the same progression takes over. At the first part of the quarter, you're really on track with life. Things are going right, but as you near the end of it, you're down in the pits and things are just wrong. Then something significant happens in life that sets you straight and puts you where you should be. You shoot back up and you're a-ok again. Then same thing... a couple weeks later, you've lost your way once more. The law of undulation is what they call it. Can we ever just keep getting better? Or at least just plateau for a while? Because the whole crashing and burning thing is really getting old every several months.

Here's the thing. I know the goals I have in life. I know what the end picture is... at least what I want it to look like. Yet it seems that I voluntarily choose every possible avenue to screw it up. It's like for a temporary moment (sometimes, not all that temporary), I put that picture down, or I blur my vision of it and I get caught up with the here and now. Granted, people say to live in the moment and to live as each if day was your last, but there is still something to be said about goals and dreams.

It's weird. Do you ever feel like you live in spite of your own self? That's what it seems I do to myself sometimes. They say you are your own worse enemy and looking back at my life in retrospect, that saying rings with so much truth.

If you guys couldn't tell, I'm in my 'downs' right now. When did life get so complicated? When did failure and disappointment become something so tangible? Sure there are several hidden gems of pure joy here and there, but the overall state of things seems to overshadow that.

I had a great talk with one of my best friends tonight and I think that is what has made me restless tonight. Being forced to bring what's been troubling me to the forefront of my mind, rather than compartmentalize it and let it fester, seems to be just what I needed.

And there was the little pinch of hope in an overall sad post.

I'm hoping the 'ups' come along soon.

Cy

My mind... is blown.

Yesterday at the MacWorld Expo 2007 in San Francisco, Apple CEO Steve Jobs announced something absolutely ridiculous. And by ridiculous, I mean it is probably the best thing since sliced bread.

A couple months ago, I watched this concept video for iTalk, a fan's rendition of what he envisioned an Apple produced cell phone to be. Check out the clip:

*By the way, the name of the song in this faux advertisement is "In the Waiting Line" by English electronica band Zero 7. Their stuff is downtempo and really chill. I love sleeping to it.*

I knew then that if the real deal was anything like that, it'd be totally awesome... And well today, I found out about the actual real deal...

Coming this June is the new iPhone. Can Apple seriously bring us anything cooler than this? It's a widescreen iPod, an incredibly user-friendly cell phone, and a mini-internet device all rolled into one small, fits-in-the-palm-of-your-hand product.




I watched the entire keynote that Steve Jobs gave yesterday online and my brains are completely splattered along the back of my wall. That is how mind-blowing this new technology is.

Apple has been working hand-in-hand with top companies Cingular, Google, and Yahoo! to bring us this incredible new innovation. The new iPhone is going to be available exclusively with Cingular. I just switched my service provider over from T-Mobile to Cingular today actually before even knowing about this. I'm so glad I did, because once June comes around, this baby is MINE.

Here's a montage of the clips found from the apple site that someone put together up on Google Video.


Steve Jobs is truly a visionary for those of us growing up in this technology/information age. I can't wait to see what he and the rest of the Apple crew come up with. This is the stuff that changes the world as we know it! He mentioned a quote in his keynote that I really liked:

"I skate to where the puck is going to be, not where it has been."
-Wayne Gretzky

That's our generation right there... coming up with new and exciting stuff. It's fun.

Do some more diggin' on your own:
Apple's iPhone Page
http://www.apple.com/iphone

Steve Jobs' Keynote for MacWorld 2007
http://www.apple.com/quicktime/qtv/keynote/

TIME Magazine Article
http://www.time.com/time/business/article/0,8599,1575410,00.html

Engadget (with pictures from Jobs' keynote)
http://www.engadget.com/2007/01/09/the-apple-iphone/

More Engadget pictures of the iPhone
http://www.engadget.com/photos/first-iphone-pics/

Freaking Kent.

I was getting all ready to spell out in detail what I've doing the last two months, but I've got a headache and I'm kinda tired, so I'll save it for the weekend at some point...

Tonight I had some friends over for Bibletalk (where you talk about the Bible. Complicated, eh?) and afterwards we played one of my favorite games, Kent.

What is Kent?

Kent is a card game played with 2-4 teams of two with each team sitting across from each other. Each player is dealt four cards and just like Spoons (right, Heather?), you want to collect 4 of a kind. However, that's the only similarity Kent has to Spoons. The dealer will lay out the top four cards of the deck face up and all players are allowed to lay down a card from their hand and pick one up on the table as much as they want. After some time has passed where no one picks up the cards, the dealer scoops up the cards and lays out four more. This is repeated until someone gets four of a kind.

Now why are there partners in this game? Well to win the round, you must be able to guess when your partner has four of a kind or vice versa without the other teams knowing. This is done through subtle hints or signs that the team comes up with in secret from the other teams. If you see your partner doing the sign, you call out "Kent". If you were right, your team scores a point. If you're wrong, you lose a point. Subtletly is the key here because if another team believes you have obtained four of the same card, they can call "Ace". If they've caught you, you lose a point and they gain one. However, if they're wrong, they lose a point and you gain one.

I like to play the game with poker chips so everyone gets a visual for how well the teams are doing. You can either play to a number of points or til a team gets all the other teams' chips.

I went to a party for New Year's Eve and we played Kent for most of the evening. It's great fun. Hope you enjoy it.

So this is... awkward...?

YouTube has a pretty cool feature on it now... You can record video off your webcam straight to their site!

And this is the result... Hope it's not as strange for you as it was for me...

Without further adieu, VLOG I...

(WARNING: It's boring. But if you're here, I assume you're already bored.)

Fun, right? *insert awkward laugh*

In other news, Imogen Heap has an amazing voice and is insanely talented. Check out this song from her former band Frou Frou on the Garden State soundtrack:


powered by ODEO

Cy

I've learned my lesson.

I just got out of my History of Jazz class that I'm taking over the Winter intercession. During class, I got a text message from one of my friends saying,

"so there's a pic on ur page that i think u might wanna remove"

Before heading out to class, I posted the last entry about The O.C. being canned. Naturally, I wondered what the heck this person's talking about. I chuckled to myself and though that maybe she's talking about the picture of the cast of the show and that maybe she has some sort of extreme dislike for the program that she's telling me to take it off my site. But I was not 100% sure, so I responded with,

"?"

to which I received the response,

"u should look. its interesting."

And with that, I became officially worried with an hour still left in class. All I could think about was what could possibly be on my innocent little blog...

I got home and refreshed my page to find that my picture of the cast of Friday Night Lights was replaced with a plump rump. And I'm not talking about roast beef. I've heard about websites giving warnings against hotlinking (when a web page of one website owner is direct linking to the images or other multimedia files on the web host of another website owner), replacing the hotlinked image with some kind of obscene thing... and well, that happened to me.

So I've learned my lesson, no more hotlinking for me! I'll take the extra couple minutes to save the image to my Photobucket and host it from there.

Sorry for all of you who saw the huge butt.

Cy

So Long, Farewell...

So not that I really care or anything, but today I found out that FOX announced officially just yesterday that The O.C. will be airing its Season 4 and Series Finale on February 22nd. (Check out E! for the full story here)

I've been watching the show now for the past year and a half. Bought all the seasons and got my mom hooked on it as well. The premier season was a brilliant drama, but the light seemed to dim as the seasons progressed. Each subsequent season has been considerably more annoying and pointless up to the steaming pile of crap for a show that we have now. The fourth season of The O.C. has so far been the worst television I have ever seen. I honestly do now know why I keep watching it. It's like an unhealthy addiction.

You can imagine my elation upon finding out that on February 22nd, I can finally be released from my weekly hour of masochistic self-induced torture. I hear that there are rumors that the new CW might pick up the show for a 5th season this fall. If they do, good luck with that. I won't be watching it. That's for sure.

The O.C. was great for a while, but really just went nowhere fast. I liked watching a TV show with my mom and I guess that's why I stuck with it.

If any of you out there are O.C. fans and are disappointed by the news and need a High School drama to stay sane, tune your television sets over to Friday Night Lights on NBC Wednesday nights at 8pm. It's MUCH MUCH better than The O.C.. The characters have so much depth to them and the plot is amazing. Reminds me of the first season of The O.C.; just without rich people driving beautiful cars and living in gigantic houses. Plus, there's football in it. That's always a good thing.

Farewell, The O.C.. You were kinda fun while you lasted. Free at last. Free at last. Thank God Almighty, I am free at last.

Good thing there's still LOST.

Cy

Darwin Awards 2006!

And now, as the year is officially over, we pay tribute to those who have 'offed' themselves in such noteworthy fashion...

...Remember, there is no first place, because truly, no one really wins...

http://www.darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin2006.html

1st Runner Up: "Hammer of Doom"

(August 2006, Brazil) August brings us a winner from Brazil, who tried to disassemble a Rocket Propelled Grenade (RPG) by driving back and forth over it with a car. This technique was ineffective, so he escalated to pounding the RPG with a sledgehammer. The second try worked--in a sense. The explosion proved fatal to one man, six cars, and the repair shop wherein the efforts took place.
14 more RPG grenades were found in a car parked nearby. Police believe the ammunition was being scavenged to sell as scrap metal. If it wasn't scrap then, it certainly is now!.

2nd Runner Up: "High on Life"

(3 June 2006, Florida) Two more candidates have thrown themselves into the running for a Darwin Award. The feet of Jason and Sara, both 21, were found protruding from a deflated, huge helium advertising balloon. Jason was a college student, and Sara attended community college, but apparently their education had glossed over the importance of oxygen. When one breathes helium, the lack of oxygen in the bloodstream causes a rapid loss of consciousness. Some euthanasia experts advocate the use of helium to painlessly end one's life.

The pair pulled down the 8' balloon, and climbed inside. Their last words consisted of high-pitched, incoherent giggling as they slowly passed out and passed into the hereafter.

Sheriff's deputies said the two were not victims of foul play. No drugs or alcohol were found. The medical examiner reported that helium inhalation was a significant factor in their deaths. A family member said "Sara was mischievous, to be honest. She liked fun and it cost her."

Honorable Mention: "Snake in the Grass" (Nobody died)

A hiker in Scotland picked up a grass snake so his brother could take a picture. Just as he reached for it, a black serpent slithered into view, so he grabbed that one, too. It was a Black Adder, Britain's only venomous snake. Both reptiles sank their fangs into the 44-year-old, who responded with serious anaphylactic shock. He gradually and painfully recovered in the hospital. His excuse for his rash act? He didn't think venomous snakes inhabited the whole of Scotland.

Honorable Mention: "Flyswatter" (Nobody died)

(April 2004, California) An adult education teacher gave 25 students an impromptu lesson in safety during his safety class. Using opaque reasoning, Teach figured the 40-mm shell he had found on a hunting trip must be inert. He kept the round and used it as a paperweight on his desk. After all, ordnance is such a unique conversation piece. But more notably, this particular ordnance was the teacher's ticking ticket to fame.

One spring morning, a bug crawled across his desk. Should he squash it with a tissue? Sweep it out the door? Leave it to pursue its happy existence, and continue on with his lesson? No; the teacher picked another alternative. He took up the "inert" artillery shell and slammed it onto the short-lived insect.

The impact set off the primer, and the resulting explosion caused him burns and shrapnel lacerations on his hand, forearm, and torso. No one else in the classroom was hurt. To the teacher's further consolation, his actions did succeed in one respect: the bug was eliminated.

Satire gone too far?

So as we all know, Saddam was executed this past week. A huge milestone in the history of time, if you ask me. On the news today, aside from the late President Ford's funeral and burial coverage, there was a lot of talk about the leaked execution video of Saddam.

I went online trying to find the clip. I'm not exactly sure why. I've seen some filmed executions online (read: my experience) and they're not that great to watch. I was definitely disturbed and it didn't sit well with my stomach. I think I just wanted to see if I could find it.

I did find it, but didn't play it all for the aforementioned reasons. What I did find, however, seemed to strike a stronger chord within me.

The following is a clip from SNL's "Saturday TV Funhouse", an animated segment that is usually a political satire. As I watched it, I was both humored and disgusted. See if that rings true with you...

Saddam-Osama
Uploaded by PigLips

Obviously the things that are incredibly over-the-top, such as Osama and Saddam being able to shapeshift and President Bush bearing a striking resemblance to our primate friends, weren't really all that offensive to me. The CIA agents 'fornicating' and Chaney talking about renaming Iraq to East Dakota reminded me a little bit of Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan. The dialogue of the Iraqis seemed like a throwback to Team America: World Police, shouting things like, "Holy Jihad" and whatnot.

What really started to irk me was the commercials. Especially the one advertising rocks as children's toys.

I don't know. I think there's a line that shouldn't be crossed, and I felt like that one was taken a bit too far. But now, even as I sit here writing this, I'm thinking about the movies Borat and Team America. Were those satirical comedies, just like this one, considered to be taken 'too far'?

I'm not sure where I would draw the line, but I do know that I just felt a little uneasy after watching this clip. The same way I felt uneasy after watching Borat and Team America. At the same time, though, is there such a thing as being too Politically Correct? I guess that depends on the person.

What do you think?
Cy

Cy Recommends... [Jan. 02]

With the new year and the new changes to the blog, I figured it'd be fun to do a weekly edition of things that I like and recommend. For now, it'll be titled "Cy Recommends..." and I'll try to do one every Tuesday. Without further ado...



Cy Recommends for the week of January 02, 2007...



I. Liquid Bean Coffee

For those of you living in the Antelope Valley area (Lancaster/Palmdale), you most likely already know about this gem located in the heart of Lancaster.

The quality rivals that of Starbucks and exceeds, based on my first impression of the place, The Coffee Bean/Tea Leaf. The prices are competitive and in most cases cheaper than it's corporate equals.

The service is fast and friendly and that's always a good thing.

Also, I'm all about supporting local and small businesses. So if you're ever in the Lancaster area, check out the Liquid Bean Coffee House.

Liquid Bean Coffee House
1711 W Avenue K
Lancaster, CA 93534
(661) 942-7591

II and III. The Fountain/The Fountain OST

Don't know if you've had the chance to catch the latest Darren Aronofsky creation, The Fountain. Released in late November, this film is both thought provoking and visually stunning. If you weren't fortunate enough to see it on the silver screen, I recommend that you catch it when it comes out on DVD in April of this year.

Hugh Jackman gives a stellar performance as three separate characters - a Spanish conquistador, a modern day research scientist, and a futuristic astronaut. Rachel Weiss, one of my favorite actresses, gives a noteworthy performance as well. The plot is convincing and though it weaves in and out of its three different stories consistently throughout the film, the general theme is easy to spot and identify with. It is essentially a love story between a man and a woman.

Here's the trailer, which in my opinion, doesn't do the movie justice.

One of the best things the The Fountain has going for it, aside from it's outstanding cinematography, is its incredibly moving and beautifully haunting soundtrack. They say the score makes the scene, and in this case that's very very true.

Even if you don't like the film, if you have any taste in music whatsoever, this soundtrack is definitely for you. *wink*

The final track on the CD is one of my favorite songs from a film. "Together We will Live Forever", though just a simple piano piece, is the song that runs during the credits that just sends shivers down the spine. Amazing.

--

Well that's all I've got for this edition of "Cy Recommends...", I'm sure as time goes on, I'll refine this weekly feature. Tell me what you think! Leave comments. I recommend it.

A New Start

Hey, Friends!

It's 2007 and the start of all things new! I figured I'd get back into the blogging scene with a fresh new makeover. I hope you all like the new template I've picked out and customized. I followed the same color scheme as my Mysapce. I also moved my old blog over to the new Blogger, so there is now more functionality as far as commenting and the sidebar goes. (Check out the new archiving system. It's really cool!)

Anyway, there's a lot to talk about that's happened over the last two months.

...and I will start on all of that tomorrow. As I'm writing this, USC just beat Michigan 32-18 in the Rose Bowl. Fight On, Trojans!

For now, Happy New Year to all of you! Hope 2007 brings you some great surprises and a lot of fun!

Cy

Hiatus.

So I just got back from a great weekend in Palm Springs. We had a college ministry two-day retreat at the Ranchos Las Palmas in Rancho Mirage. I really learned a lot, came home with some deeper convictions as well. Something I definitely needed.

So to help me keep a little more spiritually focused and get things back on track, I'm going to be fasting (or taking a break) for 2 weeks. Normally one would fast with food, but for two weeks... that'd be really hard to do. I've decided to fast from using the internet. It's something I spend WAY too much time on and honestly, it's been pulling me farther and farther away from God. So I need to give it a rest for a while to re-evaluate my life, spend time in prayer, and give my best and fullest to God.

Alrighty... so obviously, that means... no more blogging, myspace, facebook or emails for the next two weeks. If you need to get a hold of me, do what everyone else did before those things became popular. Call me.

See you in dos semanas!
Cy

Outfit Twins

So yesterday, I mentioned seeing Ben, a HOBY friend of mine. He's an actor and that's pretty cool.

Anyway, he and his buddy recently made a little youtube clip that I think is pretty funny. Check it.

My Cinematic Life

If my life were to be made into a movie, terms associated with being late or having to make up ground would probably be appropriate...

RUSH (working title)

Scene 578:

FADE IN:

INT. ELEVATOR LOBBY
The scene is white washed and immaculate. There is a lone faux plant standing in the corner.

Our protagonist and his trusty sidekick are standing anxiously in front of a set of elevator doors. A "ding" is heard and the doors open.

JUSTIN
Okay we're on parking level 1. P1. Where to?

CY
Um... The office is on the third floor
so maybe P3?

CUT TO:

INT. ELEVATOR LOBBY 2

The lobby looks the same as the last except a staircase is seen and a different plant is in a different corner.

CY
Ah crap. This isn't it.

JUSTIN
This is so odd. Everything looks the same.

CY
Seriously. How are we doing on time?

JUSTIN
It's 4:30.

CY
Dangit.

The doors close shut.

CUT TO:

INT. ELEVATOR
Typical elevator music plays while our two characters stand in complete silence. Doors open.

CUT TO:

INT. MAIN LOBBY
A very large and clean room. Granite flooring tiles and a high ceiling. A row of elevators is situated in the middle of the room.

CY
Ah there we go. This looks familiar now.

Both Cy and Justin walk to an elevator. Cy presses a button and seconds later another "ding" is heard and a set of doors opens up behind them.

FADE TO:

INT. HOBY OFFICE
The office is very empty. Just a desk with several papers is seen. A hallway stretches around the corner. Our two characters walk down the hall and are greeted by several people before making a stop at the last office down the hall. In the small office room is a man with straight neck-length hair.

CY
Hey hey! Ben Blair! What is up, bud?

BEN
Oh not too much. Just working. Oh here's your camera.

CY
Great thanks a lot, man.

BEN
No problem.

CY
Hey listen, could you give us a shorter way to get
to Universal Studios? We kinda don't want to take
the 101. We're in a bit of a hurry.

BEN
Oh for sure.

Ben logs on to google maps. Searching for a while, he finally produces a sticky post-it note with directions.

BEN
Take this route, you should be good.

CY
Thanks a lot!

BEN
Oh, and don't forget to pick up some of those Matrix
DVD sets on your way out!

CUT TO:

INT. CY'S SATURN VUE
It's a roomy vehicle that has served its owner well the last 3 years. There is some wear on the seats. There's a light assortment of trash about the floor.

CY
What time is it?

JUSTIN
Almost 4:50.

CY
Wow that took a while. Maybe we'll make it in time.

JUSTIN
Maybe. I just want to get there before she does.
I just hate the thought of her waiting alone.

CY
Aww. That's sweet of you. I'll drive as fast as I can.

JUSTIN
I try.

FADE TO:

EXT. SATURN VUE
The car is steadily cruising down the street. It's apparent it hasn't been washed in a few weeks.

CUT TO:

INT. SATURN VUE

CY
We're almost there. This was way better than taking
the 101.

JUSTIN
I agree.

A cell phone starts ringing.

JUSTIN
Oh hey babe... okay... oh... alright then.

CY
She's there already.

JUSTIN
Yep.

CY
Frick. Sorry, man.

JUSTIN
It's cool.

FADE OUT

So that was on Friday the 13th of this October when we went to go to Universal Studios' Halloween Horror Nights. It was a lot of fun. We had wanted to get to Citywalk before Heather did, but that didn't happen. Regardless, we still had a very fun night. We ate at a cool seafood restaurant called Bubba Gump's Shrimp Co. and spent the rest of the rainy night in Universal Studios for their Halloween event.

There was a camera crew running around getting people to participate in a scream contest. The finalists would be put up on the website the following day to be voted on by the public. Justin and I both participated in this contest. Justin went first and didn't do too bad at all. I went next. Justin and I sort of have this competitive kind of relationship. He and I always have to one up each other. (in a related note, Justin and I are in the same history class. We got our tests back today. I got a 95. He got a 96... touche, friend. touche.). I screamed for the camera. It was the most hammed up scream I think I could ever do. Ever. Justin promptly said, "You suck. That was like 4 screams. You know you're going to be on the website."

... and on the website I was! I wasn't a finalist, but I did make their "Outtakes" reel. I found a way to rip the video off their site and upload it for myself on YouTube. So without further ado, here is my blood-curdling debut. I'm at 1:14...


Good times. Good times.

What a great weekend

1. flying out to houston
2. hanging out with hoby friends
3. 2 stepping
4. youtube
5. wedding crashers x3

good times. good times.

I'm way too emotional.

So it started simply enough: A shopping trip to Costco. My mother and I hop into the car and drive a couple miles to the popular wholesale warehouse.

We make our way through the store grabbing the various things we need; food, detergent, food, christmas greeting cards, food, etc.

After 40 minutes or so we're done shopping and head for the registers. Once we get there, I remember what was missing.

"Oh, we forgot the oatmeal!"

My mom replies, "Ooh that's right. Go get it. You know where it is, right?"

I shake my head saying, "No."

"It's in the rice aisle."

So I go on over to the rice aisle and there is no oatmeal to be found. I thought maybe I overlooked it, so I walked down the aisle again. Nothing. I check the other aisles adjacent and no sign of oatmeal. 4 rows down, I finally spot an employee and ask him where the oatmeal is.

"It's just in this next row, bro."

I thank him and cross over to the next aisle. Lo and behold, there is the oatmeal. Next to the cereal. I grab the box and start for the registers. I make a quick pit stop to the CDs and try to look for the new Christina Aguilera CD. One of my coworkers asked her mom to get it for her birthday, but her mom did not deliver. I thought it'd be nice if I got it for her, but it was a little pricy and I was in a hurry to get home.

I reach the register area and can't find my mom anywhere.

"Cy!" I hear from a distance.

"Cyril!"

I look over and on the other side of the registers, by the food place, is my mom. All checked out and ready to go.

She motions for me to get in a line, but all the lines already have 3-4 people waiting. I breathe a sigh of defeat, set the box of oatmeal on a closed register and head past towards my mom.

"You couldn't wait?" I say to her.

"Gee, Cy. I was already in line. I thought you would be back sooner."

I was thinking to myself that I wasn't even gone for all that long. I felt disapointed. I remain silent until we reach the lady checking the receipts to who I said, "Thank you."

As we walk to the car, I can tell my mom is feeling a little uneasy. We unload the cart into the trunk. She gets into the car as I take the cart away.

I get in and start the car. I can tell she's looking at me, but I'm not returning any glances.

She starts the conversation, "Cyril, that is so rude y-"

"What? Not waiting for me?" I interrupt abruptly.

"I was already in line. What was I supposed to do?"

"Well normally, you let people go in front of you if you're not ready yet!"

"You are so rude, Cyril. Here I am, buying this food for you and this is what you do?"

I'm thinking, all this over a box of oatmeal... Thoughts of the "Lost Incident" come rushing back. I press the issue.

"Mom, why couldn't you have just waited? You don't care! You've done it again. Just like with Lost!"

"It doesn't matter, Cy. What you did was rude."

I give her silence the rest of the ride home. What is really rude about what I did? I left a box of oatmeal on the register because I didn't want to wait in line anymore.

I don't know what it is, but when my parents do something that is meant to be done with me without me, I get really discouraged. It makes me feel unimportant; like I'm not part of the team.

And yeah it seems so petty over a box of oatmeal or a season of Lost, but if it happens on the little things, what's to stop it from happening on something of more importance?

Eh. I'm over it.

Now I have to go buy some oatmeal at the grocery store.

Stop the car.

"We know that the law is spiritual; but I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin. I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it."

Romans 7:14-20

What's up with being addicted to...

Drugs
Alcohol
Food
Television
Video Games
Pornography
Smoking


What's up with being continuously/compulsively...

Deceptive
Greedy
Lazy
Prideful
Slanderous
Faithless
Ingenuous


For my own life I could pick out several things from both lists that I have a difficult time with. I am resolved that addiction to all the aforementioned is wrong. I am resolved that though I am saved under God's grace through the Christ's sacrifice, it's dangerous to unrepentantly dabble in the treacherous waters of sin.

Why is it so hard to break a habit? The scriptures tell us it's our sinful nature. What is nature? It's what's inherant. We're set up to do these things from birth.

I'm not a perfect person. It seems lately I can't go a week without screwing up and hitting the ground HARD. Where are my convictions? Where is my repantance? Where is my resolve?

Where's the hope? In God and his power.

Thankfully, turning this around isn't dependant on my strength.


I want to stop, but I cant. I want to start, but I cant.


God Can.

"No chance in Hale"

[9:26p]

Thursday night is Philosophy night, but I'm going to keep it brief and lighthearted. I just haven't felt the blogging bug this week. Haven't found all too much to write about... or I'm just lazy. You be the judge.

Tonight, Dr. Hale gave us our Midterm assignment. It was to write a paper on euthanasia, or mercy-killing. What was great about it was that on his requirements, he stressed that we do not use a plastic cover nor do we use paper clips, but rather that our paper is stapled in the top left hand corner. We literally talked about this one point for ten minutes. No joke.

He went over different scenarios of what could happen if we turn in a paper with a plastic cover or a paper clip...

Dr. Hale: "If I'm walking out to the parking lot and your plastic cover falls off and your paper is blown away by the wind, you have to ask yourself one question. Do I look like the kind of person that will chase your paper across the parking lot?"

Class (unison): "No..." *giggles and chuckles*

Dr. Hale: "Exactly. There's no chance in Hale!"

Class (unison): *laughter*


Oh man... Dr. Hale is seriously so cool. If you go to AVC, I recommend you take a class with him. PHIL 105 is an awesome class that really makes you think.

Anyway, that's all I really wanted to say. Fun times.


ooh yeah! I'm super psyched because tomorrow I'm heading down with one of my best friends Justin to Hollywood to hang out with his girlfriend Heather and her sister Chelsea. We're going to probably watch a movie at Arclight, have dinner at Bubba Gump's at Universal Citywalk, then go to Universal's Halloween Horror Nights event at 7pm. It'll be a fun filled day for sure.


woot!

[9:33p]

i still suck at poker.

[9:38p]

It's true. I've started playing poker again the last couple weeks. It's been more than a year since I've played poker seriously and I'm having a difficult time getting back into the swing of things.

Justin and I had planned a tourney for tonight at 6p. 10 people showed up. The buy-in was $20. Kinda pricy. Winner gets $120, 2nd gets $60, 3rd gets $20.

With ten people we split it up into two tables; one with 4 people and another with 6. I sat at the smaller table and was the first to get knocked out at 7:45p. By this time, two people had already gotten knocked out at the larger table.

I'm not going to go into much more detail about the tourney because you'll probably hear different perspectives of the event from both George (who is going heads up (1v1) against another player as I write this) and Justin (who is quite upset about tonight) on their own blogs.

Right now I have two Biology tests I need to study for. I had a fairly eventful weekend, but I'll talk more about it tomorrow.

Peace.

[9:42p]

I am up much too early.

[6:43a]

I'm up really early because I fell asleep last night at 10:00p. I wanted to take a nap then head out to the gym at 11:00p, but I slept instead. I woke up this morning at 6:30a.

Last night was really chill. Got home from work around 6:20p and did pretty much nothing for the rest of the night. I got bored and decided to play a little WoW. Yes, yes. I know I quit playing a little more than a month ago, but don't worry. I only played for an hour last night. That's really all I can stand to play. It's definitely lost its appeal to me.

Around 9:00p, I felt really hungry. Yesterday was a terrible day for me, nutrition wise. I've been trying to eat a lot, getting a lot of protein, carbs, and calories to build mass, but this week's been kind of lame. I've stopped keeping a food log, mainly due to laziness. I should start that up again.

Anyway, I went to Subway to get some food in my belly. As I was waiting in line (it was quite busy), I noticed a strange character in the corner of the room. He was a man, maybe in his late 40's. His shoulder length hair was blonde and wavy, but it didn't shine. It was dirty, faded, and frizzy. He wore a tattered pair of jeans and a worn green fleece sweater. The clothing fit loosely over his skinny 5'10'' frame. His face was as dirty as his clothes and was laced with many wrinkled lines. His green eyes seemed dim.

When I came into the store and waited in line, he was already done with his food. He only had a tray with an empty cup and a napkin. He didn't get up to get a refill, but just sat in the corner at his table. He had the most pitiful look on his face. At one point he sighed loudly and rocked back and forth in his chair. A few moments later, he chuckled to himself, sighing once more. His grin had turned to a smile and he shook his head as if he couldn't believe something.

As I was ordering my food, he got up, walked behind me to the soda machine and filled his cup. He went back to his table and picked up a Camelback backpack. The ones that have a tube that leads to a water bladder that you can drink from. He walked to the door, looked back at the table, gave one last sigh and exited.

It was quite an interesting scene to have witnessed. I couldn't help but wonder the entire time what this guy has been through. What events in his life got him to where he is now? I could assume that he was homeless from his clothing and hygiene. The wrinkles in his face were strong lines that probably tell many stories. His dim green eyes were intriguing. What has this man seen in his lifetime? What was he reflecting on that made him sad and moments later made him laugh?

I wonder, if I was in his situation, could I still find humor?


-Cy

[7:10a]